You are already getting lots of suggests and support!! That's what is soooo nice about this group. Everyone has their experiences to offer others as you, encouragement. Just remember to live in the moment. Stay focused, think of the positive, and build your solid relationship from the ground up taking babysteps. Know that this doesn't happen over night, but is a process. ("I would like to eventually have a well-trained mare.") And base it on love, not fear. This doesn't sound like horse training, but you are already getting lots of pointers from experienced folks.
Have fun,
Laura of Cal.
--- In haflingerfriends@yahoogroups.com, "susanna_thorne" <susanna_thorne@...> wrote:
>
> I'm writing this email as a way to vent my frustration and discouragement. I'm a full-time student that at age 57 decided to go back to nursing school. At that time, I had a older dead broke brood mare that I was forced to place when the demands of school, family and work became overwhelming. Not surprising, 3 years after giving up my horse, my blood pressure soared, I gained weight and with it cam a bunch of aches and pains. With 1 year left of school, I decided to purchase another horse that could help me cope with the stress of nursing school and give me an outlet. My husband and I talked a great deal about the amount of time I would have with the horse and he agreed to help me out with the feeding and care of my horse. I could not own this animal without his help.
>
> Why I'm discouraged is that I bought a 6 year old mare that has not turned out to be as trained as I was lead to believe. I was told that she had not work out as a competition animal but loved to trail ride. But, until I know this animal better, I'm really hesitant to go anywhere that is out of sight of our home. She is extremely gentle but headstrong. We have a small farm homestead and we raise sheep and chickens. This winter the mare shares a run-in with 5 ewes and a Great Pyr. They all get along amazing well.
>
> I am an advanced beginner rider. This summer I spent time working on ground manners and was making good headway. But, now that the horse is out in the paddock and winter is here I have limited daylight hours to work with her.
>
> She won't willing lift her feet to be cleaned and this week she kicked the farrier. She has become really pushy for hay especially now that she feels she competing with the sheep even though the sheep and the horse are fed in separate areas. Another thing that bothers me is that when I approach her she backs up. If she were a dog, I would consider her behavior as being "hand shy." My barn time is spent grooming her and talking softly and mucking out the run-in. But, doing anything on the ground is difficult with batches of ice, covered with snow.
>
> I'm an avid reader. For Christmas my husband gave me a basic text on riding. I have purchased and read a used Parelli book. My thoughts now are to write out some simple lesson plans and work with her. But, we haven't bonded and that wonderful owner/horse relationship is not there yet. I finally purchased a saddle that fits her to a Tee but until I feel that I can trust this mare, I have not ridden her out of the enclosed paddock area.
>
> What are some of the simple exercises I can do in a limited area that will build trust and rapport between us. Just so that you know - while I have not trained horses, I am a retired agility and obedience dog trainer. I tend to be a "positive trainer" but I also realize that I'm not dealing with a 50 lb dog.
>
> I not ready to throw in the towel. But, I would like to eventually have a well-trained mare. When I graduate in May 2010, I will be in a position to hire a trainer to work with me. But, until then I really would like to have established a solid working relationship with this horse. Any suggestions or shared experiences would be appreciated.
>
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