I haven't even written in response to your post because visualizing your wreck brings up painful memories for me. I know the sobs of disappointment and pain you went through. I think all of us who have had wrecks and were (are) able to get back into the saddle again are tremendously courageous. I'm not sure what draws us back to the saddle, or why the love of horses is so strong that it cannot be fought. Here you are, bruised, battered and shaken, yet analyzing what happened and how it can be prevented in the future instead of throwing in the towel and giving up. That's bravery! My trainer has been honest with me. My horse is better suited to a younger, more in shape and experienced rider. I do wonderfully well with his Steady Eddie horse. He likes my style and my soft hands and quick release of pressure, etc. My Charlie, although bonded to me, and as gentle natured as he is, is still spooky, reactive and ultra sensitive. Even a sniffle from the rider makes him jump and worry, although we have sniffled ourselves silly around him on the ground and the trainer in the saddle, trying to desensitize him. I'm not ready to give up, but I don't think I could ride out some of his huge spooks. He responds to a one-rein stop well, but that won't matter if I'm already on the ground. I won't sell him even if I can't ride him. He means too much to me, even though I can't afford another horse right now. I play ball with him, and he's getting the idea of rolling it back to me with his nose. I do everything I can think of to spend time with him, except ride. Yet. Not giving up!
On a lighter note (pun intended) I told my family that my New Year's resolution is to serve more fruits, veggies, whole grains and quality proteins to the family and to quit baking goodies except for very special occasions. They were a bit miffed when they saw me printing out recipes for HORSE COOKIES within the next hour of my announcement. Another reason for them to be jealous of Charlie! LOL
Take Care,
Marlene in Oregon
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